REALITY CHECK

     This blog is sort of a continuation  of my last blog.  I am feeling very strong about the personal connections issue and feel I need to get it off my chest.  I apologize ahead of time for any bad feeling that this may bring while you read it. It is not my intention to alienate or hurt anyone's feelings.  Here I go...

Last week was a good week!  I realized that I am happier now and have bonded with the group of people that I think of fondly as my "Margarita Happy Hour Group".  It really makes a difference for me here in the Philippines.  I am not as homesick and I look forward to the fellowship, outings, activities besides our Isaiah Project  Missions.  This keeps me busy not thinking about the lack of communication from "home" (the States).  It took a year for this to develop and not a minute too soon!  I see now that GOD did not put us here on this earth to be by ourselves.  Yes, we need our own time and space to regroup and gain perspective but in reality we were innately made to commune with others in every aspect of the word.

MARGARITA HAPPY HOUR GROUP

     My new peeps make my time here pleasurable.  However, I am very sad and disappointed in people back "home" for not keeping in constant communication with me (I don't mean every day, rather once a week to once in awhile) -- no one and I mean no one Skypes with me, even though they said they would -- even my cotton pickin' family!  This angers me when I think about it!  I should not let it get to me and it takes all my effort not to.  I think, "Where is the courtesy?"  Don't promise or say you will do it then don't! I know for a fact I would do this for others.  I understand and realize that people have their own busy lives, BUT they can still reach out!!  Look at my friend, Sara!  She's is extremely busy being a Soccer Mom/Wife to a house full of males, working full-time and doing all sorts of other activities/outings AND we message back and forth almost daily!

     Now, I want you to understand what I am saying here...I am not wanting any type of pat on the back, "way to go, at ta girl" sayings or any justifications as to why you are not in communication, that doesn't matter to me.  I just want to be acknowledged that you know I am still out here and I am missing you. I am in need of personal connections through all types of communication.  Even if it's just that quick "hello" or a smiley face through: Messenger, email, Facebook, Google Plus, Skype, and many others that includes the lost art of sending a card or a letter through the postal service.  If you can't do one method, there are others to choose from.  With today's technology it is almost impossible NOT to keep in touch!  Just a side note here...I want to express my deepest love and gratitude for those who do keep in touch!  I, again, apologize if you happen to feel guilty.  It is not my intention for you to feel that way.

                 

     The act of keeping in touch is a two way street.  I just want to let you know that I have communicated but wasn't always responded to and if there is a response it was like a brush off.  That hurt, but I keep trying until there is no response. Truly, if you absolutely don't want to communicate, just say so.  At least I know where you stand, and that is ok.  Then, there will be no hard feelings.
     

  Alas, the realization that people are who they are and I have possibly placed way too much expectations upon them.  Just because I like to do this for others doesn't mean they like to do it in return... I am sad at this but I guess that's reality.

Missionaries Need Constant Encouragement!

   When missionaries used to go out into the field the expectation was that they were isolated and, on rare occasions, they were able to send a brief word that they were alive and doing GOD's work.   In todays world of technology missionaries don't have to  be isolated.  Through satellites and computers (even in remote areas, access permitting) there is instant contact.  For my husband and I, we have a website, a facebook page and email for our mission where anyone, at anytime, can greet us, encourage us, pray for us and partner with us.  So, why do we feel like the isolated missionaries of long ago?

     I can justify this question with a lot of anwers, but it really comes down to the fact that people see missionaries as "out of sight, out of mind."  I know that there are partners of our mission that stay in prayer for us and encourage us, but we still somehow feel isolated out here in the field.  How is that possible?


     I think that it is very necessary, even with constant contact with the world, that missionaries be lifted up daily and encouraged directly.  Facebook is a good tool for this very purpose.  A short comment. A smily face.  A prayer. Something tangible to show the love, care, compassion for the missionaries being supported.  It's just that simple, right?

     It does take a little time, but you are already on Facebook, aren't you?  No?  Well, then email works, too!  Make the time to be supportive.  Isn't that what is said at the sendoff for the missionaries?  You will stay in contact to see how they are doing? You will pray for them and/or financially support them while they are out there in the field?  Then show them that you still do.  Send something daily, weekly and/or even monthly to show that they still matter.

     All kinds of people need encouragement, feedback, awareness that they matter to others.  It's part of human nature.  It's imporant for self-confidence and self-esteem.  So, don't just  give lip service, give physical/tangible service and show the missionaries how you can be supportive.

   

     That is all, I am now stepping off my soapbox.  Thank you kindly!

Pooing in a Tropical Forest

Our trip to Mindoro to check on our installed water filters was quite eventful.  The first full day we spent with the Hanuno'o tribe and one particular family.  They were so gracious and saw to our every need.  Now, mind you, when you go up into the mountains to visit with them you have to be prepared for everything because you just don't know what will happen.

My adventure started right after having breakfast with a young man named Man-Iw.  Man-Iw is from the Hanuno'o tribe.  He visits with us every time we visit Mansalay (the town where we stay while in Mindoro).  Man-Iw is writing a book about the history of his people.  What an undertaking he is doing!  He stated that he is on his third book but only has published a book of poems.  Ok, I need to get back to my adventure, I sort of went off on a tangent!

As we sat in the van ready to drive up into the mountains for our visit I started to have stomach cramps...I thought...uh-oh...for me stomach cramps usually meant diarrhea *sigh*.  I can't take anything for it neither because of my medical condition.  So, I had to figure out quickly if I could make this trip or not.  I decided to take the chance.  I was prepared with wipes which I carry all the time everywhere.  I told my husband, "Well, I guess I'll have to find the nearest bush to go if I needed to."  I was half joking.  My husband just looked at me.

What a view...spectacular!!

                                   
After getting up the mountain and into the village my cramping got worse.  We still had an hour hike to Man-Iw's.  I was still determined to go on.  Stupid me wanted to challenge myself with this hike.  My health usually stops me from enjoying stuff like this.  And it certainly looked like it was going to, once again!  Phooey!!  My husband continued to ask me if I was doing ok...my answer was always, "Yes."  I really wasn't.  In fact, 10 minutes into the hike, the cramping was so intense I got light-headed and had to stop. "Hay naku" (Oh my gosh)! *gurgle, gurgle* Yep -- diarrhea!

I apologized profusely to everyone, Arnel, Man-Iw and his auntie, Lalie.  We headed back to the village with Arnel lecturing me about not being fit and healthy enough to hike like this.  Of course, he was right but I told him I had wanted to challenge myself and build up my endurance for stuff like this.  We were there to disciple and by golly I was going to hike to Man-Iw's family home to do just that!  Nope --- we headed back to the village.  Arnel, Auntie Lalie and Man-Iw talked among themselves as I silently concentrated with each step with "don't poop, don't poop...".  They decided that we would go to Auntie Lalie's home instead.  They told me this and I thought, ok!  Well, it's the one by the road from where we were standing at that moment.  No, it wasn't!

The "Don't Poop" hike.

We hiked another 15 minutes in the opposite direction down the mountain from the village.  There was lots of shade, that was good.  And thank goodness my cramping calmed down -- that was until we got to her house where it started up again in full force.  Does a bear poop in the forest?   YES...is my answer!  In fact, it was my "bare" butt and in a tropical forest!  Sorry folks from here on out the story gets a bit gross...

When you have the urgency to go there is absolutely no choice in the matter where you go!  These people don't have CR's (comfort rooms -- public bathrooms) up here on top of this mountain!  I told my husband I just have to do it.  I have to go find the nearest bush.  Even if he tried to get me down off the mountain and back to Bayan (Mansalay town proper) I wouldn't have made it and would have pooped my pants!  Man-Iw's cousin, Maria, poor girl, was my care taker. And care for me, she did, too!  She helped me find that nearest bush, which wasn't so near and I almost messed my pants the four separate times she helped me find "the spot".  Unbelievable!

It's the rainy season, so mosquitoes and flies are out in full force. Yuck-oh!!!  I have bites on my butt and thighs.  When you stick it out like that you are bound to get bit!!!  I'm just glad it wasn't from a spider or ants.  Though, my second spot was full of those big red ants and I had to back out fast and yell for Maria that I needed a new "spot".  Poor Maria, I felt so bad for her but she was very sweet about this entire issue and even helped me walk a few times to and from the "spots" because of tripping over the uneven terrain.  She even interrupted her cooking once to take me out into the forest.

It's a good thing I tote those wipes (Cottonelle, Folks -- only way to go!  Hahaha, sorry that wasn't suppose to be a pun -- but there it is!)  Despite feeling ill, it was very relaxing fellowshipping with Man-Iw and his extended family.  We stayed for lunch even though I could barely eat it because of my stomach.  It was very tasty and simple.  Just chicken boiled with lemongrass and rice.  We drank fresh coconut juice right out of the coconut, which did help my stomach some.  They were all worried because I wasn't eating much.  I assured them I was ok and tried to eat as much as I could under the circumstances.

The lower left are the coconuts we drank from.

Ok, here is the gross part...in order to get the essence of my situation I need to share this...ready?  Here we go...  As a "spot" was found I was handed a small jug of water -- I knew that it was for washing myself after going because it is the customary way to clean after going here in the Philippines.  Up in the mountains they don't use toilet paper.  I didn't use it for this purpose I had the wipes to take care of that job!  When I was "finished" I poured the water over the poo.  The mosquitoes and flies that found me were swarming over it, too.  Wholly swarm, Batman...I figured the water was better spent washing away the poo than on me and would take care of the mosquitoes and flies also.  As for the wipes, they are disposable.  They would disintegrate in time.  And, even though everyone knew what I was doing in the forest I still didn't want them to know where I was...so, I did what all the animals of the forest do...I back-kicked dirt and leaves over where I went.  D.O.N.E...done, done, done!

FILIPINO FOODS

The Filipinos have a lot of the same type of foods as we do in the States, so, I am able to find familiar items here.  But, they have a lot of food items that we don't.  And, they certainly cook their food quite differently than we do.  Some of these foods I already have eaten in the States at dinner parties of friends who are Filipino and when my husband gets a craving for some and cooks it. Of course, living here it's all we eat and I love most of it!  The following are examples of foods that are...interesting.

Milkfish soup

Fish. One main difference of how they eat it is they eat the entire fish.  For example, it doesn't matter what fish it is they will cook it whole. I first encountered this practice in the states when I went to visit my in laws for the first time before my husband and I were married.  I thought, wow, that smells so good!  I love eating fish!  When I was called to dinner, the fish was brought out and placed onto the table.  I was horrified...the fish was staring at me with those blank eyes and with a gaping mouth that looked like it was screaming!  Wholly smokes, I wanted to scream right with it.  I am not used to that.  The fish Momma always cooked while I was growing up was already filleted.  I knew one could buy fish like that, but I never knew people actually cooked and served fish in its entirety. This was definitely a new experience and one I had to accept because that's just the way they eat it here.  In fact, the head of a fish is a delicacy.  Hmmm, no, thanks.   Perhaps one day, when I get over my food snobbishness, I'll give it a try.  I'll continue to eat bits and pieces of the body even though I'm picking out the bones.

Balut

Another item of food is Balut.  Balut is a developing duck embryo, basically a fertilized duck egg. Did you catch that? Balut is not your ordinary hard boiled egg.  There is a baby duck inside!   Yes, you read this right...a duckling.  My husband loves them as most Filipinos do.  This I won't try even after I get over my food snobbishness.  I was told to try it with my eyes closed so I won't look at it.  I...just...can't.  I can't get over the fact that what's in there is a baby duck.  It's amazing I'm not a vegetarian with the hangups I have with some foods!  Good grief!

Dinuguan with Puto

Dinuguan (blood soup) is a delicacy that Filipinos love to eat anytime.  They eat it poured over rice or with Puto (rice cake).  To look at it it looks like chocolate pudding but the smells quite different, I assure you!  I tried it and it's not for me.  My sister-in-law makes it home-made and it's a hit with everyone.  I grew up eating blood sausage that I didn't like it no matter how many times I ate it, so a blood food item isn't new to me.

Malunggay

Vegetables are mostly grown here by the locals and are staple ingredients in a lot of recipes.  Bitter melon is a vegetable they cook with eggs and meat (usually ground pork) in sabaw (the broth is called sabaw which they like to pour over their rice).  It is bitter but the mixture with the other items in the dish tone down the bitterness.  It takes getting used to and if it is scraped just right while it's being prepared then it can be quite tasty.  I like it.  Malunggay (Moringa oleifera) is a small leaf from the horseradish tree of the same name.  This leaf is added to a lot of ulam and breads.  Malunggay is used just like we use parsley in recipes.  It has a light flavor that enhances whatever it's cooked with.  I like this also.  Most vegetable dishes are never just vegetables; they always add some type of meat with it.

Durian

Jackfruit

Turon

Fruits are quite interesting.  You know about Mangoes; the Mangoes here are even more flavorful than the ones in the States.  In fact, I think the ones in the states are imported from Mexico.  I'm not saying their Mangoes aren't good, just that Filipino mangoes taste better to me.  Here are a few tropical fruits that you may not know of: Santol, Durian, Jackfruit: Duran has a very strong rotting smell to it and if you ask the locals, they either love it or hate it.  I have not tried this yet but, I am curious.  Jackfruit has a light fruity flavor but it's not distinctive and goes well with bananas.  Or, fried with plantains in a wrap they call Turon...which is the most yummiest dessert here, ever and, I LOVE IT!!!  Santol is a fruit that has a cotton like flesh wrapped around huge oblong seeds.  You don't really eat it but section it apart and just suck on the cotton like flesh that surrounds the seeds.  I was trying to chew off the flesh from the seeds and mentioned to my husband that it sure was stringy...he laughed and said you don't eat the flesh, just suck on it.  Now he tells me after getting the strings of flesh stuck in my teeth!  When you do that it gets really slimy and you have to be careful not to accidentally swallow the seed.  I think that this fruit is a waste because all you get is a taste and nothing more.

To end my blog, here are some basic words I learned that have to do with food:  Ulam means entree.  They refer to this word a lot when they are cooking, serving or buying a main dish.  Sabaw means broth.  As I mentioned above, it's the broth in any dish that is soupy.  Patis is fish sauce. This smells bad but I tell you it is great stuff!  It adds so much flavor to most any dish. If you use this sauce you definitely don't want to add any seasoning to your food due to the high content of sodium in it because it is so concentrated.  Toyo is soy sauce and I don't need to tell you how to use this, hehehe.

Before ending I do want to mention something about common etiquette.  If you are discovering foods that are completely foreign to you and it looks gross or smells to high heaven DO NOT MAKE A FACE.  Apparently, I make faces I am not even aware of! Oooppsss! Accept the serving with a smile, try the food then make the decision if you like it or not.  To not accept the serving will offend your host...not a good impression, especially if you are in a different country (big note to self)!

Useful items

I titled this "Useful Items," but really, the items are a necessity here in the Philippines.  "What items?," you ask. Well, cotton underwear, bandannas and hankies.  Of course, you are asking me, "Really?  Underwear?  That's a given, you always wear underwear!"  My answer is, "Cotton underwear".  COTTON is the key word here.  Cotton is very breathable and highly absorbent.

Wear cotton underwear (undershirts and underpants) under your shirt and lightweight shorts while you are in hot and humid weather.   They will keep you sort of dry.  I say "sort of" because you will sweat and sweat and sweat and sweat even more! Your clothes will be wet but they also will dry just as fast...because they are COTTON. 

You are asking me, "Why should I put on a t-shirt under my shirt?" or "Why should I wear 2 shirts? It's way too hot for that!"  I'm smiling here because I asked the same question!  So, I tried it.  There had to be something to it because, for one, my husband does it all the time, and for another, a lot of people here in the Philippines do it, too.  At first, I felt hot!  I wanted to rip it off and just run around naked...that just wasn't an option...I would have been spotted, tracked, netted, tagged and caged, and possibly, shipped to an animal sanctuary where they would monitor me and label me as some kind of monster, maybe even an unidentified new animal species.  So, I kept it on and toughed it out for the day. I was pleasantly surprised that, even though I was sweaty, I felt comfortable and partially dry.  I went out and bought a couple of tank t-shirts.  I may even pick up several more.

Now, on to bandannas and hankies.  I never had use for them.  I grew up with them and only saw my grandmother and my mother use hankies.  I thought that hankies were pretty and were given as gifts when you just couldn't think of what else to give an elderly person.  Bandannas were what cowboys wore...on TV.  Then, of course, came the 1980's, when people wore them around their heads, arms, and necks as a fashion statement.  I wasn't into that.  I married my husband in the early 2000's and guess what he used?  A bandanna as a hanky.  He grew up using them and always has one tucked his pants back pocket.  When we arrived in the Philippines, I saw that a lot of people used bandannas, hankies and even towelettes, all cotton, of course.  Hahaha, cotton.  I'm telling you cotton is the fabric to use, besides it's the fabric of our lives, right?!

Here in the Philippines, when you are using public bathrooms, also called comfort rooms or CR's, you will not find paper towels or toilet paper.  They stopped stocking these items because the locals decided they needed these items more than the general public. Now it is custom to bring your own. You may find vendors selling these items outside the CR doors but, I always try to remember to have a bandanna on me so when I wash my hands I have something to dry my hands with. It's good to have on hand because you never know when you'll need it.  And, since this is a hot and humid country you'll need it to mop the sweat from your brow and the back of your neck.  The locals even tuck it into the collar of their shirt or into the back of their pants at the waist to soak up sweat.  I think they do it when they aren't wearing the cotton t-shirt under their shirts.  It's a smart thing they are doing.  Personally, I will wear the cotton t-shirt under my shirt to soak up the sweat instead of wearing a towelette or bandanna.  

I now have a new found respect for cotton underwear, bandannas and hankies. Maybe I should have titled this blog "COTTON"! 

Being A Missionary

Have you ever been a missionary?  Was it a short term mission (a week to 3 weeks) or a long term mission (1 month or more)?  Well, when my husband and I first got called we committed to 2 years of missionary work, bam!  It wasn't local neither; it was clear across the world on the island of Mindoro.  Mindoro is one of 7000+ islands that make up the Philippines.  One minute we are active church members in our community in the States, the next we are doing water filtration for the Hanuno'o Mangyans, a native tribe of Mindoro.  Wow...10 months later and I can officially say that I still can't believe I'm here doing this.  I've learned so much about the culture of the Philippines, about being a missionary, and about how to live hot and sweaty.  Now, mind you, some of us Westerners, we don't like to be sweaty!

We have another year and 2 months to go, taking 2, possibly 3 showers a day trying to stay cool.  Powder, you say?  No, tried that.  It cakes up on you and then adds to the sweat which creates mud.  Eeeeewwww.  We have discovered powder with cornstarch in it, which actually works better.  But, on a positive note, sweating gets rid of impurities within your body.  Just make sure you drink gallons of water a day...well at least a liter but don't expect to be peeing a lot because you just sweat it out.  It's important to stay hydrated.  Something that I learned just recently is to drink green tea.  One cup a day should be sufficient and because it is unbelievably hot, drink it cold or iced.  What that does for you is balance your PH level within your body. Ha! Who knew...only the Asians, that's who! My understanding of having the right PH level within your body is to help with healing and keeping your body from being acidic.  So, it promotes overall body health.   Am I a health care representative...hahaha...no...I've been sleeping in an Asian country for 10 months!